I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
