Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
