I'm drive I can fine osifer
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize