My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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