but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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