So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
