What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
