I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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