belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize