he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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