let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Randomize
