barbara walters just said penis...
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Randomize
