Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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