I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
you mean i was at the winter classic?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
