Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
It was confusing and full of hummus
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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