I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
