i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
