You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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