hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
