You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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