i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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