dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
high people should be assigned attendants
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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