everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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