i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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