So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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