turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize