Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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