Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
