woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
you win again, gameday.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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