I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
is that a dick in a sweater?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
