Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
