I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
