Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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