They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
