airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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