if only i could text you this smell
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize