What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
