This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
