you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
