so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
