I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
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