Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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