i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize