k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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