booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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