She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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