Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I made him laugh his dick is mine
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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