Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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