My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
