# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
So much Jack, so little girl.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
