i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize