? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize